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Elton John and I agree …

... that this year's Oscar show was the worst ever ... totally BORING!!!!!!!!! And apparently we are not alone.

Here are a few suggestions for next year:

1) Get Steve Martin or Billy Crystal to do the show. (DO NOT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER or your show will suck.)

2) Nominate FIVE songs, not three.

3) Make a rule forbidding rap music from being nominated.

4) Don't put together montage after montage of film clips to break up the monotony of the show. (HINT: If the show is not monotonous, it won't NEED to be broken up.)

5) Don't keep telling us how great movies look ON THE BIG SCREEN in a pathetic attempt to increase theatre attendance. (HINT: If you stop making crappy movies, you won't have to do things to increase attendance.)

6) Make sure that at least ONE celebrity wears a dress that will have people talking the next day. (Think Bjork and her swan dress or Nicholson's ex-girlfriend in her tutu.)

iTunes is currently playing: I Love L.A. from the album Trouble in Paradise by Randy Newman.